Poetry: Dis Illusion of Trust

I do believe you were very brave- as you are- and goofy- as you are But it takes a big back/heart to be that brave and goofy and with confidence (or foolishness?) So you showed me what I asked to see- although I had no idea that was your intent and then I damned you for it, which was essentially damning myself And you Laughing all the while But you have been in the business of the transformational mirror (and so obvious) long enough to know that I was preferably blind all that energy watching and stepping closer to see the changes And in some ways I am glad for you that you had some fun with it (except the whomping) And in some ways I am not And you Laughing all the while It didn't set too well with me when I began to see, that is And you Laughing all the while And those moments of unpleasantness resistance And now you really Laughing all the while Serious Stuff this business of Finding Oneself as Loving And you Laughing all the while I want you to know this was not what I had in mind when I asked... There's more But then recently I "got" that I was going to have a dog and then I house sat with a puppy that was a walking poop machine without the blessed distinction of indoors and outdoors And, really, I have to be more specific with the Universe, or more accepting of shit